I roto i te oranga o ia rā ka tūtaki tonu tātou ki ngā whakaaturanga o te atawhai, te whakaute, me te āhua hoa ki ētahi atu. I ētahi wā ka tino hiahia te tangata ki te āwhina i te hunga e noho tata ana ki a ia, i ētahi wā ka whai noa ia i ngā tikanga o te noho pai, ā, i ētahi wā anō ka huna ngā tino whakaaro me ngā tino hiahia ki muri i tētahi ataata māhaki me ngā kupu atawhai. Ahakoa he tino ōrite te āhua o ēnei whanonga ki te hunga e mātakitaki ana, he tino rerekē ā rātou pūtake i te tirohanga o te mātauranga hinengaro.
Ko te atawhai tūturu he āhua o roto e aro ana ki te oranga o ētahi atu. Ka āwhina te tangata ehara i te mea e rapu ana ia i te utu, i te whakamihi, i te painga rānei mōna ake, engari nā te mea e rongo ana ia i te aroha me te ngākau aroha (empathy), ā, e hiahia ana kia pai ake te ao mō te katoa. Ko te pūtake o te atawhai ko te āhei ki te mārama ki ngā kare ā-roto o tētahi atu, me te urupare tika ki aua kare. He maha ngā mahi atawhai kāore e kitea e te nuinga o te tangata, nā te mea ehara te whāinga i te whakaatu i te pai o te tangata, engari ko te tautoko pono i te tangata e tino matea ana.
He rerekē te pūtake hinengaro o te whakaute (politeness). He huinga tikanga pāpori tēnei e āhei ai ngā tāngata ki te noho pai me te whakawhitiwhiti whakaaro i runga i te rangimārie. Ka taea e te tangata te noho whakaute ahakoa kāore ia e tino rata ana ki tana hoa kōrero. Ko te mihi, te tuku mihi whakawhetai, te whai whakaaro ki ētahi atu, me te kōrero whakaute ka whakaiti i te tūponotanga o ngā raruraru, ā, ka waihanga i tētahi taiao pai mō te katoa. Nā reira, ehara te whakaute i te tohu o te piri ā-kare ā-roto, o te atawhai rānei, engari he taputapu nui mō te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero i roto i te hapori.
He mea whakamere, ko te tangata tino atawhai he maha ngā wā ka noho whakaute hoki, engari ehara i te mea ko te tangata whakaute katoa he tangata atawhai. Ka taea e te tangata te tino pai ōna tikanga me te tika āna kōrero, engari ka noho makariri tonu ā-kare ā-roto, kāore hoki e tino aro ki ngā raruraru o ētahi atu. Ko te whāinga matua o te whakaute ehara i te whakaatu aroha ki te katoa, engari ko te pupuri i ngā hononga whakaute i waenga i ngā tāngata.
Mai i waho, ka tino rite te hātekēhi (hypocrisy) ki te atawhai, ki te whakaute rānei. Ka taea e te tangata hātekēhi te ataata, te tuku kupu whakamihi, te whakaatu aroha, me te tuku āwhina. Heoi anō, kāore pea ōna tino whakaaro me ōna tino hiahia e rite ki ngā mea e whakaaturia ana e ia. Ko te tino āhuatanga o te hātekēhi ko te waihanga mōhio i tētahi whakaahua rūpahu mōna anō, mō āna hiahia rānei. Kei muri pea i te āhua pai ngā hiahia pērā i te rapu painga mōna ake, te whai kia whakawhirinaki mai ētahi atu, te karo i ngā kawenga, te whakahaere rānei i ngā tāngata hei painga mōna.
Mai i te tirohanga hinengaro, he maha ngā take ka puta ai te hātekēhi. I ētahi wā ka mataku te tangata kei whakakāhoretia ia, nō reira ka ngana kia pai ake tōna āhua i tōna tino āhua. I ētahi atu wā ka whakamahia te hātekēhi hei huarahi ki te whakatutuki i ngā whāinga whaiaro. Ka pā hoki ki ētahi tāngata kua roa rawa e huna ana i ō rātou tino kare ā-roto, ā, kua kore rātou e tino mōhio ki te nui o tō rātou kore pono. Ahakoa te take, mēnā ka roa tēnei āhua e haere ana, ka hua mai he taumahatanga ā-roto, nā te mea me whakahaere tonutia ngā kupu me ngā whanonga kia mau tonu ai te āhua i hangaia.
Ko tētahi tohu nui e āhei ai te wehewehe i te atawhai tūturu i te hātekēhi ko te ōritetanga o te whanonga. Ka atawhai tonu te tangata atawhai ahakoa kāore he tangata e mātakitaki ana, ahakoa kāore hoki he painga ka puta ki a ia. Ka noho pūmau tōna whakaaro ki ētahi atu i roto i ngā āhuatanga rerekē. Engari, he maha ngā wā ka kitea te hātekēhi ina kore he take kia mau tonu te āhua pai. I aua wā ka tino rerekē pea ngā kupu me ngā whanonga o taua tangata.
He mea nui hoki kia mōhio ehara ngā kore pono katoa i te hātekēhi. I ētahi wā ka huna te tangata i tōna riri, tōna ngenge, tōna mamae rānei kia mau tonu ai ngā hononga pai, kia kore hoki e puta he raruraru. He maha ake te pānga o tēnei ki te whakahaere i ngā kare ā-roto (emotional self-regulation) me ngā tikanga pāpori i te hiahia ki te tinihanga i ētahi atu. Tērā pea kāore e taea e te hapori te noho pēnei i tōna āhua o nāianei mēnā ka whakaputa te katoa i ā rātou kare ā-roto katoa i ngā wā katoa e hiahia ana rātou.
Hei whakakapi, kāore te atawhai tūturu e hiahia kia whakaaturia nuitia. Ka āwhina te whakaute ki te pupuri i te pai o te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero, ā, mā te pono ka taea te karo i te hātekēhi. Ina ū ngā whakapono o roto o te tangata ki āna kupu me āna mahi, ka tīmata ngā tāngata ki te kite i a ia hei tangata pono, hei tangata whakawhirinaki. Ko taua whakakotahitanga o te pono, te whakaute, me te atawhai te tūāpapa o ngā hononga tangata hauora me te oranga hinengaro pai.